Slater’s 50/50 owner Scott Slater and chef Brad Lyons offer a Counter-style checklist that allows you to design your own burger, but you’re better off sticking with Slater’s Signatures. The Anaheim Hills restaurant and sports bar sells burgers loaded with Caprese, peanut butter and jelly or Thanksgiving dinner, only one of which actually sounds enticing. Still, it was impossible to ignore The 50/50 ($9.95), a true perversion of nature that’s made with 50% Prime chuck and 50% bacon.

The patty is available in 1/3, 2/3 or one-pound increments, weighed after cooking. I limited myself to 1/3 pound since the burger was piled with avocado, a fried egg, pepper Jack cheese and chipotle aioli. The meaty monstrosity is speared with a knife, which adds to the drama.

I grabbed the soft bun and an obscene amount of lip-stinging aioli spilled out of each side. Pressing down on the bun also caused the egg to rupture, washing the avocado, cheese and meat with yolk. Since the patty is 50% bacon, Slater’s is required to cook the burger to medium well, so the meat itself could have been juicier. The 50/50 burger was completely over the top, and it’s hard to imagine eating another one anytime soon. Still, with the array of ingredients, and the sheer volume of bacon, the burger was plenty flavorful.

Dose of Vitamin P spotlights my favorite pork dish from the previous week.